In this Master Chef era I began to wonder if I could easily identify the ingredients for family mediation. For 10 years I have focused my practice on keeping separating couples out of court. This helps them to save time and money, to reduce their stress levels. My passion is to support parents to find a way to separate their finances. Also to work together to make a parenting plan for their children that will encourage collaborative parenting. This reassures children that they still have a family even though it looks different.
Working in mediation can be a real challenge and harder than people expect. A mediation solution that is tailor-made for your family. It meets the highest needs of both parents can leave you in a healthy and positive parental place. Having enough emotional support and the right financial support is key to successful mediation outcomes.
So, what are the ingredients needed for separating couples to work well in mediation.My mediation recipe would include the following ingredients for family mediation:
– a separating/separated couple willing to work together to find solutions that can feel ‘fair enough’ to both;
– a commitment to transparency and sharing of information;
– good enough financial trust;
– a future-focused and problem solving approach;
– a willingness to listen hard to each other and to consider compromise;
– an acknowledgment that children need the love and support of both parents delivered across two homes in a way that does not marginalise or undermine either parent;
– resilience to keep going even when things feel difficult;
– momentum once the process is underway;
– some parallel legal advice from a ‘mediation-friendly’ solicitor;
– emotional awareness and support from a mediation coach can be helpful;
– timely and constructive financial advice delivered in a neutral way;
– a committed and flexible mediator;
That might sound like a long list of ingredients. Remember that a mediator’s job is to help facilitate the process by implementing a structure. We need to ensure you are clear about the ingredients and have a method to follow to reach the end point.
Maura McKibbon, https://smartdivorce.co.uk/author/mauramckibbin/, is a Collaborative Solicitor and Mediator based in Altrincham. She offers a free, no-obligation, telephone consultation so that she can help people understand all of their options without them feeling under pressure. Having been a divorce solicitor for over 20 years I understand the pressures for clients. I trained at Pannone LLP in Manchester and since qualifying I have specialised exclusively in family law, qualifying as a Family Mediator and then as a Collaborative Family Solicitor, helping couples and parents undergoing the pain and trauma of separation. She has a personable approach, in which care goes hand-in-hand with legal excellence. For an informal consultation regarding any aspect of your separation, please call Maura on 07515 809552 or through her website http://www.mauramckibbin.com/
If you enjoyed Maura’s blog, you might like to read “How can a financial planner help when getting divorced?”